I really don't understand...

Why can't any technology just function correctly for once? First, my laptop died, in the middle of a busy week with a paper due. Now, out of three digital cameras, we have lost one and the other two refuse to work. The oldest of the bunch was on it's way out, we knew that. But that is why we just bought the new one to replace it. Now the new one doesn't work! What gives??



I wanted to show you my daughter's first spelling test, but instead I will have to tell you. I think, first of all, that having impromptu spelling tests for half-day kindergarteners is a little much, and apparently so do most of the other mothers. Especially when the kids are graded, and then given their tests back with big ol' red x's all across them. Lilly came home almost in tears. Give me a flippin' break!! It would be ideal if she could spell all those words, and had this year been given a little more thought and consideration, I can guarantee you she would be able to spell all those words, as well as read them! But she can't. Neither can any of the other kids in Miss Helton's class. That is partially my fault (for letting her go) and partially Miss Helton's fault (for being a teacher who doesn't know how to teach). I am a little bit flustered by this situation, as you might have detected.



So, she comes home with this spelling test last week. We look it over, and she tries again, and guess what! She spelled every word correctly, at home. Twice. When she had a little time to think about it. She is entirely capable, and actually is doing quite well at the basics--at home. But when Miss Helton evaluates her...not so much. She always scores very poorly. The only thing her teacher will tell me is that she does "satisfactory" work. Pshaw! Whether it is a combination of teaching style, Lilly's nerves, or who knows what else, the learning just isn't happening. This is a child who has memorized nearly 100 verses for AWANAS-- and she is only there 1 night a week! One night a week, for two hours, and she can learn a boatload more than Miss Helton has even tried to teach her!! She can recite off the top of her head all the books of the New Testament (granted, she sings the end of the song a little differently than it goes..."1,2,3 John, Rude and Violations!" I giggle every time) and can easily sing each of the AWANAS songs, or tell you any of those 100 verses from memory. Folks, she can remember how to say "Thessalonians" but gets a bad grade on a spelling test for "we"? She has a brain! She can use it! But whatever Miss Helton is doin', it ain't workin'.



So today, Daddy went to pick her up. She came in, brought me her homework folder (yes, homework. They have also had to do presentations and dioramas and posters...ridiculous!) She pulls out today's spelling test and hands it to me with a downward cast face. She was afraid to show me that she missed two words!! My heart ached.


Today they had to spell, impromptu, from verbal commands only, these 7 words : me, my, to, be, the, said, and we. Except Lilly had written "Wii." And her teacher marked it wrong! I know it technically is wrong, but she did spell "Wii" right! I showed Jon, and we could not stop laughing. Finally, Jon hitched up his pants and said "Well, that there is how we teach 'em around here!" My mom called, and as we were chatting, I told her about the spelling test, and she thinks Lil should get credit- hey, she did spell it right after all!



That is my daughter, child of a video gaming generation; bright, witty, and maybe a little bit out of the box. I'll take her.

Did I not warn you my kids are cute?

So, just a very few minutes ago, the girls and I sat down around the table for "nap-time craft time." The girls are quite certain that their purpose in life is to create small bits of cut -up paper and glue and glitter, play-doh snakes and braclets, and new this Christmas, alien goo creatures; these works of art all become a "present" for mom. So I always highly encourage craft time! We have had to add the "nap-time" part due to a dear little boy who doesn't quite grasp the intricate qualities and concept of sitting still and not eating glue; so craft time has been curtailed to nap time. Lilly also hasn't quite grasped the idea of descretion- Lil will come up and ask me "Why can't he take his nap NOW??" while he is sitting on my lap finishing his lunch. Nicky knows something is up, but he's usually too tired to fight it.

So today the craft of choice was "Martian Alien Maker." This is, in my opinion, a marketing scam, a waste of time, any number of ridiculous things. But it was the only thing Lilly asked for for Christmas. Recently, at a friend's birthday party, the little girl opened a refill kit for her "Martian Alien Maker," and I saw the glimmer of realization spark in Lilly's eyes. I told her, a few weeks ago, that when the "goo" was gone, then it was gone. Thinking of course, that's all the money I'm going to spend on this ugly plastic waste; unfortunately, Lil came up to me after the present opening and said, very excitedly "See! I told you they had refills! I can make more even after the goo is gone!" Ugh. Anyways. A lesson in how money is spent in our house is due again about now.

The girls were bantering back and forth as they worked on their respective aliens. It went something like this:
Lilly: "Look, Grae! Do you like my creation?"

Grae: "What? You made a lion?"

L:"Nooo...I made a 'creation.'"

G:"A bea-lay-ton?"

L: "No, a creation. Everything is a creation- God created it. He created all the animals, and us, and the whole world. A 'Cre-at-ion!'"

G:"Cwe-ma-shun?"

L:"NO! 'Cre-AY-SHUN!"

G:(shouting) "BE-LAY-SHUN! CWE-AH-BUN!"

L:"Ah! NO! It's CREE-AY-TION!!!"

G:(singing and "shaking her booty" as she says) "Cweadulun...beation...cwemation...YEAH!"

L to me: "Is she really in our family???"

At that point, I was laughing too hard to answer. This "shaking the booty" thing, well, that is another story; but seeing how Graecy instinctively got under Lil's skin...oh, that was just too funny. Not that I am happy Lilly was annoyed, but the fact that Graecy knew what would make her mad and undermined Lilly's determination to make Graecy do what she wanted her to. Maybe you think I am a terrible mother for thinking that, but the earlier they learn to accept that they are entirely different personalities, and that they may not always get along or agree, then hopefully they will have a better time of it than if I constantly made them 'kiss and make up." Lilly hates that her brother and sister have their own ideas about things, and she wants to constantly make them fall into line like her own little ducklings. But Graecy is not about to be put in any place...so seeing them interact without coming to blows was funny, as opposed to frustrating.

I have to now go wipe the goo off the kitchen table before it hardens into neon green and pink fossils that chip away the varnish.

She comes by it honestly?

Tonight was a bath night. Not unusual; in fact, most nights should be bath night with my kids, but we don't always get around to it before bedtime. But Mondays, they are always bath night. (I love the smell of a clean baby's head- there is nothing better than Johnson's and soft, warm baby hair).

I should also say that I have never, ever, in my entire life, known of human children who love the water more than my kids. It is a bit unnatural. They will sacrifice dessert (even chocolate!) to have a bath instead. They will soak themselves repeatedly while washing dishes (they love to wash the dishes- standing at the sink, scrubbing things with lotsa bubbles- amazing it doesn't hold my interest as much) and have no problem just hanging out in wet clothes.
My mom gave them a toy fishing rod with foam fish for Christmas- they stopped opening presents and insisted she get out a bucket for them to play "fishing. " Which they then did, for nearly 2 hours. We had to bribe them back to opening the rest of their presents! So tonight, I strapped them into their seats so they would be forced to finish at least half their macaroni before the wailing for bath time started (if I don't strap them in on bath night, they will skip dinner all together).

We have also resolved the (occasional) issue of dessert on bath nights- popsicles in the tub! This is another reason why bath night is such a favorite. I have discovered a new kind of popsicle called "minis"- about 1/4 the size of regular pops, and in fun shapes. My kids can eat them (because they aren't too big, they don't melt and fall of the stick before they have a chance to take a few bites, and they are small enough that little hands can hold them), and they do so with vigor. Tonight both Nick and Graecy chose orange, so they would match. And in the tub they went!

Nick's mouth was getting a little cold, so he was trying to find a place to set his orange pop down, and inadvertently stuck it under water.


Me: "Oh no! Don't stick it in the water! It will melt!"

Nick:"Mewt? Mewt mewt!"

Graecy: "Yah, Bayba, and then it will be gone!"

(Graecy has taken to calling Nick "Bayba"; apparently it is a combination of the endearing term "bubby" - which Lilly calls him, and "babe"- which I call Jon.)

N: "Ooh!"

G: "And then that is how the earth makes gets our tummy's full."

M: "The earth makes our tummies full from melted popsicles?"

G:"No, silly mommy!"

???

Later, as we were draining the tub, Graecy and Nick were putting toys in the bucket and hanging their wash clothes to dry. Graecy kept sticking her wash cloth over the drain (I have learned to pull the plug before they get out- they will actually voluntarily exit the tub if it is empty) to keep the water from going out.

Me: "Graecy, move your washcloth. The water needs to drain."

Graecy:"But I don't want to get out!"

M:"Bath time is over! Please hang your washcloth now."

She stands to do so, then turns to me,

G:"But I'm just so sad.'

M:"Why are you so sad?"

G:"Because my toys is going round and round and down and down."

M: "Your toys can't fit down the drain. They're ok; come on, hop out!"

G:"Mommy! Princesses don't hop! They flop!"



Well. That is bath night at my house. They make Mondays a little easier.